HomeSelf ImprovementAuthetic Happiness – There Is No Way To Happiness, Happiness Is The Way

Authetic Happiness – There Is No Way To Happiness, Happiness Is The Way

How to change your attitude to change your life.

1.1. Accept you just as you are. Pay close attention to your internal chatter and make it more positive. Make a list right now, a list of all your strengths.

1.2. Create. Go to Play and relax whilst creating a dream board

1.3. Visualization. Take 15 minutes to imagine yourself on a beautiful beach. Walk along the shoreline. Use your senses to hear, see, smell and feel the beach. Meet a wise old sage who gives you a gift. What gift did you receive today?

1.4. Pace and Balance Yourself. Take mini breaks throughout your day. During these mini breaks do the opposite of what you are doing the rest of the time. Ie if you sitting down at work concentrating, then move about and free your mind from thinking. If you rushing around a lot the stop, sit down and breathe, do some visualization to relax.

1.5. Don`t Compare. You are unique and are not on this earth to compete with everyone else. You do not have to measure up or achieve anything. Authentic happiness comes from deep inside yourself and enjoying just being who you really are.

1.6. Positive Psychology. The power of your mind is so underestimated. Using affirmations is a wonderful tool for training your mind to become more useful to you. Write out a few negative statements. For example. I am a failure and I will never be happy. This changes to I am the architect of my own life and create happiness by just being.

1.7. Determination. Make a commitment now to use your strengths and ignore your weakness.

1.8. Meditation. Learn how to do it. Then do it. It really works. It is a major key in taking steps towards experience authentic happiness, without it the mind is always striving, in striving we lose the way.

1.9. Blaming. Like me I bet you can find reasons to explain why you are angry, frustrated, depressed, miserable, etc. However much I blamed in the past, eventually I learnt that I had to give it up if I wanted to be free, authentic happiness is emotional freedom. The key to emotional freedom is to be released from the past. If you suffered as a child then get a therapist to help you release the pain, then commit to healing.

1.10. Heal. Authentic happiness is a by product of healing past pain. Love is a great way to heal and people who work as healers can bring great peace into your day. Explore healing energies such as Reiki, massage etc and see how you can release the pain from your body.

1.11. Food. Authentic happiness and feeling positive about life creates balance. The more positive you become, the less you will want to over eat or eat food that is bad for your health.

1.12. Needs. All humans have basic needs. In order to experience authentic happiness at levels of say 9 or 10 you must meet these needs. You have to feel safe and secure in this world, you have to have fun, challenges and adventure, you must be loved and you must love, you need to feel significant and important, you need to grow and you need to feel that in some way you make a difference, you contribute to the world. Think about your needs and how and who meets them.

1.13. Addiction. Addiction is not bad. Being addicted is human nature. When we find something that makes us feel good we get addicted to it. This is our greatest strength and our greatest weakness as human. Authentic happiness begins when you replace your negative addictions with positive addictions. Find things you love to do, help people, take personal growth workshops, push yourself out of your comfort zone and become addicted to the things that are good for you.

1.14. People. I had a friend who used to say ” The havest is vast and the workers are few” become one of the workers. Nothing creates more lasting positive feelings and authentic happiness than doing something that helps someone else. Don’t do it for approval or credit, do it quietly and go unnoticed, watch how you start to develop self esteem.

1.15. Self Esteem. People with great self esteem are working on becoming less “self” focused. They commit to helping others, to listening more, to taking less, to giving more. They also learn that a wise woman waters her own garden first. Comes back to balance again.

1.16. Don`t martyr your soul. As above do not try to give to others what you can`t give to you. No matter how hard you try to love others, the secret of attraction in life is that energy is all we got. So if your energy is mean towards you, you will only ever attract that to yourself. Become your own best friend, romance yourself, become someone you really like. Other people will mirror back to your the quality of the relationship you have with yourself, so make it a good one. Balance again, don’t over indulge and don’t be mean to you. Find the balance and you will find balanced people attract you. Balance is where the drama and pain stops and the love begins.

1.17. Smile. My favourite meditation is to sit in front of a mirror cross legged with beautiful music playing and smile. Just smile. Smile into your heart, tell your heart you love it and you will take good care of it. When the smile touches your heart and you feel love, then turn your meditation outwards to the world. The world needs your smiles and love.

1.18. Get organised. I love this website. It helped me to clear the clutter in my mind. Get organised but don’t get striving. Develop a beautiful attitude of clear headed determination with a wonderful sense of being unattached to the outcome of the things you plan. If it is meant for you it will come to you, relax and let life flow.

1.19. Study the Tao. When you are content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or compete, everybody will respect you. Lao Tzu.

1.20. Do something new. Authentic happiness blossoms in a heart and mind willing to move out of comfort zones and into new territory.

1.21. You are the architect of your identity. I spent a few years hanging out a lot with people in the 12 step community and became very interested in how fixed and certain they were about identity and how limiting the beliefs were that they held about their identity. Maybe it time for you to update your identity. All of us are capable of expanding our view of who we are and what we are capable of being. Be careful that you don’t limit yourself with labels. Be wary: Whatever you consistently attach to the words” I am” you will become. For example, someone may say ” I am stupid, a failure” they may not be stupid or a failure but have just not found yet the thing that will propel them towards feeling successful and smart. Change your limiting beliefs about yourself NOW !! Only you get to define who you are.

1.22. Surmounting difficulty is the crucible that forms character. When I was in the midst of very trying and difficult times I really did not want to know that is was character building, in fact I felt quite the opposite, I felt like failure, a loser. With hindsight I now know that all the pain and troubles were making me wiser. So accept life is hard and then grab a huge dose of certainty that YOU can create a life of authentic happiness.

1.23. Live fully. My final word is from my hero, Tony Robbins. In his book Giant steps he writes ” Live fully while you`re here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You`re going to anyway, so you may as well enjoy the process! Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: Find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don`t try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.

Carol Finlayson, certified Tony Robbins Coach and Author of “Turn On The Lights” a self help book taking you from fear to living a life beyond your wildest dreams. Visit her website at:

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